Category: Fibromyalgia

Active

As I do more and more energy work, it’s clear to me that pain is intimately connected with a sedentary lifestyle. I’m not saying that being very active means no pain, because I’m not even close to being there yet.

But I do know that when I work on moving energy in dark, impacted, or pinched areas, or when the gray “soot” leaves me, something in my body relaxes. Sometimes it’s deep inside my body, sometimes on the surface. The fascia resists and then suddenly glides, and tendon and ligament and muscle and vessels and nerves underneath all suddenly relax.

Being “active” is not sufficient. It needs to be something where you stretch every bit of your body in every way possible. No wonder yoga lifts the spirits as well as making your body feel better. Even just wiggling your spine, pelvis, hip joints, shoulder joints, ribs, neck around. I’m convinced that even just massaging your own armpits for a couple of minutes a day would immediately have an impact on pain, but also a gradual impact on general health.

I’m really happy to see that it can be done with the mind, or at least, with energy clearing. It’s not as efficient when used as an alternative to movement, versus a companion to movement, but that makes me really hopeful for those who have limited mobility.

Made of stars

So I’ve been practicing energy work on myself for a little more than a year now, experimenting with different techniques but mostly just trying to intuit it.

For a variety of reasons, my chakras were so clogged, dark energy everywhere, in some places so thick that the area looks black rather than the color of that chakra’s (normal) vibration, as well as lots of things embedded in them, knotted spots, caged off areas, and even gaping holes. Lots of very deep-seated traumas and fears and a minefield of painful memories.

Over time, it has really almost started to freak me out how directly these wounds correspond to physical ailments, especially bodily pain. Clear some of this gunk and you literally feel a muscle or tendon or something relax, usually from someplace deep inside your flesh. I notice it most really close to bones – along my spine, my neck, shoulders, hipbones.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this openly, but I was tentatively diagnosed with fibromyalgia last year, after years of trying to figure out what was going on. So many tests, medications, chiropractic adjustments, so much physical therapy and acupuncture. It always helped but seemed to just be holding the problem at bay, keeping the symptoms from getting worse but rarely actually feeling better. It takes so much energy and time and money just to maintain the relatively poor level of health I am feeling, to maintain hope that it won’t decline any more.

I’ve been doing a lot of work lately, especially psychological and energetic, and that blackness is no longer pervasive. The colors are muted and covered with soot and film, but they aren’t hidden anymore. They are opening up again. Tonight for the first time, a few small spots were able to get so clear that I saw the true color of those chakras, how bright they are. I immediately thought

“My god! It’s full of stars.”

Bodymap

This is so freaking cool… I’ve gotten to the point where when I close my eyes, after a couple of seconds, I can see my energy/aura/chakras clearly enough to understand where there are problems on my physical body – for example, an area that looks grayish or brownish (or even the occasional spot of black), a spot that looks pinched or twisted, or clogging up against the flow of the rest. Then it can be used as a chart to find a corresponding spot on my body, that when giving the spot a few seconds of myofascial release technique, releases in a way that feels not unlike the joy of unbuttoning your pants after a holiday meal. Works 100% of the time.

Once the really obvious stuff is cleared in a spot, I can see more imperfections, and those tend to be deep in the body, so for those I just touch the spot and focus on releasing it. Those ones can hurt quite a bit – but just for a moment – and afterwards my whole body seems to settle differently. It’s helping so so much with the [sic]mental stuff [wow that was Freudian. I typed medical but got autocorrected. Fair enough Apple, it’s true a lot if my medical stuff is from stress, anxiety, grief, and other stuff that has been going on].

I want to try it on other people soon – right now I have no idea whether it only works on myself or if I could learn to do it for other people, which would be wonderful.

Ouch

Whelp. Just got a couple of cortisone and at least 15 lidocaine injections in my neck, shoulder and shoulder blade. Hopefully this does the trick and stuff stops hurting or at least hurts less soon. I honestly can’t even remember what it feels like to not be in pain, but I’m gonna try to have some faith.

Pain management

People with chronic pain: at what point do you ask to be referred to a pain management specialist? Did you wait for your doctor to suggest it, or is it something you need to pursue when you realize your primary doctor’s/specialist’s treatment plans are not working to reduce pain enough?

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