Tag: fibromyalgia

Made of stars

So I’ve been practicing energy work on myself for a little more than a year now, experimenting with different techniques but mostly just trying to intuit it.

For a variety of reasons, my chakras were so clogged, dark energy everywhere, in some places so thick that the area looks black rather than the color of that chakra’s (normal) vibration, as well as lots of things embedded in them, knotted spots, caged off areas, and even gaping holes. Lots of very deep-seated traumas and fears and a minefield of painful memories.

Over time, it has really almost started to freak me out how directly these wounds correspond to physical ailments, especially bodily pain. Clear some of this gunk and you literally feel a muscle or tendon or something relax, usually from someplace deep inside your flesh. I notice it most really close to bones – along my spine, my neck, shoulders, hipbones.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this openly, but I was tentatively diagnosed with fibromyalgia last year, after years of trying to figure out what was going on. So many tests, medications, chiropractic adjustments, so much physical therapy and acupuncture. It always helped but seemed to just be holding the problem at bay, keeping the symptoms from getting worse but rarely actually feeling better. It takes so much energy and time and money just to maintain the relatively poor level of health I am feeling, to maintain hope that it won’t decline any more.

I’ve been doing a lot of work lately, especially psychological and energetic, and that blackness is no longer pervasive. The colors are muted and covered with soot and film, but they aren’t hidden anymore. They are opening up again. Tonight for the first time, a few small spots were able to get so clear that I saw the true color of those chakras, how bright they are. I immediately thought

“My god! It’s full of stars.”

Come on, chemicals…

It seems like every time I go to a doctor, I end up with yet another prescription. Chronic illness sucks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VeIL7juFE0

Ouch

Whelp. Just got a couple of cortisone and at least 15 lidocaine injections in my neck, shoulder and shoulder blade. Hopefully this does the trick and stuff stops hurting or at least hurts less soon. I honestly can’t even remember what it feels like to not be in pain, but I’m gonna try to have some faith.

Pain management

People with chronic pain: at what point do you ask to be referred to a pain management specialist? Did you wait for your doctor to suggest it, or is it something you need to pursue when you realize your primary doctor’s/specialist’s treatment plans are not working to reduce pain enough?

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